"Aging woman" joke

Age 8:
Looks at herself and sees Cinderella / Sleeping Beauty etc.
Age 15:
Looks at herself and sees Cinderella / Sleeping Beauty / Cheerleader or if she is PMS'ing: sees Fat / Pimples / UGLY ("Mom, I can't go to school looking like this!")
Age 20:
Looks at herself and sees "too fat / too thin, too short/ too tall, too straight / too curly" - but decides she's going anyway.
Age 30:
Looks at herself and sees "too fat / too thin, too short / too tall, too straight / too curly" - but decides she doesn't have time to fix it so she's going anyway.
Age 40:
Looks at herself and sees "too fat / too thin, too short / too tall, too straight / too curly" - but says, "At least, I'm clean," and goes anyway.
Age 50:
Looks at herself and sees "I am" and goes where ever she wants to.
Age 60:
Looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can't even see themselves in the mirror anymore. Goes out and conquers the world.
Age 70:
Looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter and ability, goes out and enjoys life.
Age 80:
Doesn't bother to look. Just puts on a red hat and goes out to participate in the world.
Age 90:
Can't see and so doesn't worry about it!

Normal people believe that "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." Engineers believe that "If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet"

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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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your momas so fat when she steped on a scale the scale said o shit i want ur weight not ur fone number

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A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good more...

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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