"Europeans are bad drivers" joke

Europe's first spacecraft to the moon ended its three-year mission by crashing into the moon, the goal being that the cloud of dust and debris created would provide clues to the geological composition of the site. The crowd in the German mission control room applauded.
My car's first mission to the side of my neighbor's house ended similarly.
(With a German crowd applauding as well.)

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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there were three young poly boys on a road trip a samoan a tongan and a maori .. the tongan and maori wer in the back seet while the samoan was driving ..
the samoan lost controll and of the wheel and hit a tree ... all threee polly boys died .. they all got too the gate of more...

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If Ida Lupino married George Wendt, then divorced him to marry Ted Danson, divorced him to marry Alan Alda, then divorced him to marry Ted Knight, and divorced him to marry Shelly Long, she'd be Ida Wendt Danson Alda Knight Long.
If Whoopi Goldberg married Peter Cushing, more...

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your hairline so far back i thought u went bald in 3rd grade

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Boudreaux was feeling guilty, so he went to confession. "Father, I kinda took a leetle lumber from dat new construction site."

Priest: "What did you do with the lumber, my son"?

Boudreaux: "Well, Father, my porch, she's had a hole more...

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