"Garn Collingwood" joke

I think this family is from Broady (Broadmeadows). Broadmeadows is a suburb of Melbourne Australia with a good reputation. There is no love lost between the following 2 AFL Football Teams.

A family of Collingwood supporters head out one Saturday morning to do their Christmas shoplifting. While in Rebel sports, the son picks up an Essendon football jumper and says to his 20 year old sister "I've decided to become a Bomber supporter i would like this for Christmas".

His sister, outraged by this, promptly whacks him around the head with her carton of Winfield and says, "Go talk to Mum". Off goes the little lad with Essendon jumper in hand to find his Mum.

"Mum?"

"Yes son?"

"I've decided to be an Essendon supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas".

The mother is outraged by this and throws her moccasins and full V. B. tinnie at him, promptly whacks him around the head and says, "Lets go talk to your father".

Off they go to Pentridge during visiting hours and find Boofa, his Dad. "Dad?"

"Yes son"?.

"I've decided to be an Essendon supporter and I would like this jumper for Christmas". The father is outraged and promptly whacks his son around the head with his fists and says, "No son of mine is ever going to be seen in "THAT" and then kicks him from one end of the rec. room to the other for good measure.

About half an hour later they're all heading back home to Reservoir in the E. K. Holden. The mother turns to her son and says "Son I hope you have learnt something today"

The son says "Yes I have".

"Good son what is it.".

The son replies "I've only been an Essendon supporter for 3 hours and I already Hate you Collingwood Mongrels"!!!!.

A tour bus driver drives with a bus full of seniors down a highway, when a little old lady taps him on his shoulder. She offers him a handful of almonds, which he gratefully munches up.
After approx.15 minutes, she taps him on his shoulder again and she hands him another more...

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A couple of days into his trial, George, the man accused of committing the crimes, stood up and asked for permission to approach the Judge.
"Your Honor," George said, "I would like to change my plea from innocent to guilty of the charges."
"If more...

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Two rednecks, Bubba and Cooter, decided that they weren't going anywhere in life and thought they should go to college to get ahead.
Bubba goes in first, and the professor advises him to take math, history and logic.
"What's logic?" asked Bubba.
The more...

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A teacher was doing a study testing the senses of first graders,
using a bowl of Lifesavers.
The children began to say:
"Red... cherry,"
"Yellow... lemon,"
"Green... lime,"
"Orange... orange,"
Finally the more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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